You shall love your neighbor as yourself. (Matthew 22:39 (NKJV))

Difficult people can be . . . well . . . difficult. So, what should you do when you encounter them?

It’s tempting to try to get away as soon as you can – or avoid them altogether. Let’s face it, sometimes we wish we were high up on a mountaintop where they can’t find us. But that’s not what God wants us to do. Instead, the simple answer is that you should love them.

We all have difficult people in our lives. I’ve heard it said that if you can’t think of anyone then you’re the difficult one (haha). But seriously, we can all be “difficult” at some point or another. So, dealing with difficult people is just a part of life.

Jesus told us how we should treat others. And He didn’t qualify His commandment based on how the other person treats you. Jesus said,

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.” This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself’.” (Matthew 22:37–39 (NKJV))

Who is your neighbor? It’s common in the English language to think of your neighbor as being limited to the person who lives next door to you. However, the Greek word for neighbor is plesion, which means any person who comes across your path.

Jesus’ commandments can be simply put: love God and love others. And how are we to love them? The Greek word for love in that verse is agape – the kind of love with which God loves us – a self-sacrificial love. It’s the highest kind of love.

In First Corinthians 13, we learn more about agape love. It tells us,

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4–8 (NKJV))

Jesus calls you to be patient with the person who irritates you. He wants you to be kind to someone who has been disrespectful to you. He wants you to love others as He loved you.

It’s a high calling. And it’s one you can only fulfill when you’re walking in God’s Holy Spirit. You can’t love with His agape love if you only have your own selfish desires in mind.

So, the next time you need to deal with a difficult person – while talking on the phone, by responding to a text message or email, or while she is standing right there in front of you – ask God to help you love that person with His agape love. Pray for guidance about what you should do and what you should say. Ask Him for His love to flow through you and into that person’s life.

In short, love each person God puts into your path. Be patient. Be kind. Don’t be proud or rude. And don’t demand that you get your own way. Choose to do things God’s way and love others with His agape love as you walk by faith with Him.

Photo by Denys Nevozhai on Unsplash